CONSUMMATE PRETENDERS

Keith Osei-Boateng kept glancing at leather watch almost every five minutes and every time he does this, he sighs and rolls his eyes. Damn, where was Kwamena? Kwamena has been his best friend since their senior secondary school days. It was 9a.m. Great! Was Kwamena playing pranks on him or what? For Pete's sake, he was tired of waiting for the past thirty minutes. Ah, he was sure he had been only waiting for Kwamena, he would have left the eatery a long time ago. He had been tempted to call him and ask where the heck he was but decided against it. He was eager to leave the eatery and perhaps go and swim. What kept him waiting was that he was curious, very curious! Kwamena has promised to introduce him to a female friend of his. He knew what that meant...since Kwamena was so convinced that Keith needed a a girlfriend and he was desperate to set him up with one. What baffled Keith was why Kwamena wants him to have a girlfriend when Kwamena was currently single. Strange. What was his friend up to? He wondered why Kwamena was acting like the outsider who weeps louder than the bereaved! Keith has told him times without number that he doesn't need a woman in his life now. All his excuses have fallen on deaf ears. He was just twenty-seven for Pete's sake! Well, he would be twenty-eight in a few months...Geez. So, here he was wasting a precious Saturday morning in the name of meeting a woman. Another Eve! Worse, another Delilah or is it Jezebel? Maybe, she is a Ruth or Rebekah. He smiled as the thought crossed his mind. Who knows, he might like her. After all, Kwamena has eyes for quality stuff. He ordered for a can Coke and ice. Just as he took a sip, he saw Kwamena coming in through the entrance with a lady. He waved at them as they moved towards him. When they got to his table, it was then Keith realised there was only one empty chair available. He almost felt embarrassed and quickly pulled one from another table towards his. "Hi Keith. Hey, sorry for keeping you waiting. You know, traffic as usual," Kwamena explained. Keith smiled and rolled his eyes at him. "Okay, I believe you. Just sit. You can't keep the lady standing." Kwamena looked apologetic as he turned to the lady. He apologised to the lady, Georgette with a smile. She smiled back and sat. "Come on Kwamena, we've had enough of your apologies for a day. Spare us another one, please," Keith said with sarcasm. "Okay boss," Kwamena said, and bowed his head slightly in jest. Keith asked them what they would like to drink and Kwamena chose Malta Guinness whilst Georgette requested for bottled water. As the waiter approached their table with the order, Keith was deep in thought. Did she just want water? She can drink water anywhere for Pete's sake. Oh, maybe, she was just being coy. He took a cursory look at the dress she wore. Well, her dress didn't look funny but it certainly looked like a good girl's dress, unless she is a pretender. He laughed inward as he thought about this. He wanted to be sure. "Georgette, please are you sure that's all you want to drink?" he asked nicely. She gave him a slow, lazy smile. "Yeah. Thank you for asking." He nodded. First impression was working perfectly. Immediately Kwamena cleared his throat noisily and apologised, Keith knew he wanted to say something. Great. "Well, I think it's time I introduced you to each other," Kwamena said with excitement in his voice. Keith smiled at him and then at Georgette. "Before you say anything else Kwamena, let me say this, please?" Kwamena knew he was being anything but polite. He shook his head gently and smiled knowingly Keith looked at Georgette who sat across him. "Georgette, you know my name and I know mine, right? He's also given you some information about me and also told me a little about you. Now, we've met today. Tell me, in all honesty, do you think he needs to introduce us to each other again?" She smiled coyly and looked at Kwamena, then back to Keith again. "Georgette, I don't think he heard you," Keith pointed out. His smile was mischievous. She laughed heartily. "Well, I don't think he needs to do that." "I guess I am the outsider here. I guess I don't want to become the outsider who weeps louder than the bereaved. Please excuse me," he said, bowing in mock salute. "Come on, we're not saying you can't be with us. We're only saying we don't need your help. Isn't that what we're saying Georgette?" Keith tried to explain. He winked at her. She agreed with him. Keith knew they would get along just fine. Or will they? Kwamena decided to leave. When he left, Keith told her, "I guess we can have some privacy now. So, do you like the water?" She gave him a quizzical look. How silly, he thought. Wooing a lady wasn't child's play. Time to change the question. Consummate Pretenders- Continuation "I mean, you know, all brands of water taste quite different. Do you like this one?" That sounded lame and it still didn't make sense. However, she smiled and responded. "Yeah." "I'm glad. Well, how long have you and Kwamena been friends?" he asked gently. "For two years," she replied simply. Keith was surprised and she laughed when she saw the strange look on his face. "Really? Kwamena has never mentioned your name in our conversations. Isn't that strange?" She laughed again and explained that she works at Kumasi and comes to Accra usually on weekends. Keith wasn't still convinced with her explanation. For Pete's sake, he knew all Kwamena's female friends except her. He was the one without any female friends. He wondered if Kwamena was interested in her. Well, if he is, he wouldn't have allowed them to meet alone. For minutes, they talked, laughed and occasionally teased each other. Keith was surprised at himself. It was almost as if they've known each other for years. Later, Georgette said she had a confession to make. Keith listened with rapt attention. He didn't utter a word as she spoke. When she was done, he also made a confession. "So, I guess we're in the same boat. I think we must drink to that. What drink do u want?" Keith asked her, smiling gently. She rolled her eyes at him. "Come on, Keith.i told you like water." He grinned. "Well, our glasses are empty. What do you suggest?" She picked her glass up and asked him to do the same. "I would like to propose a toast to us," she told him and he nodded. "We drink to our friendship, health and laughter," she chortled. They said cheers and 'drank" from the empty glass. She decided it was time she left and he escorted her out, hailed a taxi and they said bye to each other. Before the taxi moved, he asked, "Don't you want my number?" "What's your number?" He called out his number. What if she never calls? He was sure they had enjoyed each others' company but that didn't mean she would call or even see him again. Does he care if she doesn't call? No. There, he has his answer. He smiled broadly. Later that evening, Kwamena called him. He knew his friend was curious to know what had transpired between him and Georgette. "So, how did it go with her?" Kwamena asked gently. "Well, I didn't enjoy her company. Were you expecting me to? Tell me Kwamena, did you promise her something if she succeeded in charming me?" Keith asked cheekily. "No, why do you ask?" "Well, she sounded quite desperate to me so I thought you had promised her something. Kwamena, did you send her to test my resolve or you sent her win me over?" Kwamena laughed out loud and said, "Well, I'm surprised a smart guy like you is asking me this question. You should find out. You know, she's a wonderful person and I think I made a mistake letting you meet her. I wonder what I was thinking," Kwamena said slowly. Consummate Pretenders- Continuation Keith was silent for some time and then spoke. "Are you interested in her?"he asked bluntly. "Maybe. I'm not sure yet," Kwamena answered. "Well, she took my number and I didn't take hers. Consummate Pretenders - Continuation The next day, he called Kwamena to ask him for some information about Georgette. Kwamena was pleasantly surprised. He couldn't believe his ears. "Come on, Keith. If this is a practical joke, I'm not interested. You told me you didn't like her. So, why why are u suddenly interested in her?"Kwamena asked, obviously flabbergasted. "Do I need to explain everything to you? "Keith asked cheekily. "You know what, you two are birds of the same feathers. It's amazing. You guys are pretenders." Kwamena went on to explain what he meant when Keith demanded to know why he called them pretenders. Kwamena told him that on the day he and Georgette had met for the first time and parted ways, she had called to inform him that she didn't find Keith attractive and only yesterday evening, she had called him to find out more about Keith. He thought that was strange and then today, Keith was also curious about her. "What's going on, Keith? I'm at sea here," he said. "Did she tell you anything?" Keith asked cautiously. "Anything like what?" Kwamena tossed back. "I guess she didn't. All comments reserved." "I see. Well, it takes two to tango and two can play this game. You suit each other perfectly, pretenders." "I would take that as a compliment, my friend. Maybe, Georgette and I would agree to tell you something later. That is if we agree to tell you. Now, tell me about her, please." In some minutes, Kwamena was done with the information. Keith thanked him. Kwamena could hardly stop laughing when the call ended. Keith's single days are finally over. He wondered what had done the trick. Was it when he implied he might be interested in Georgette? He would find out later. Maybe, after....